[ That phrasing just makes him tighten his grip even more. ]
No. I can't.
[ His head raises just enough to place a small kiss at the base of his neck. It's selfish. He said he wouldn't demand anything of Sholmes, that he wasn't expecting anything.
But he can't just let him run away. It feels like something... would break. ]
You keep trying to make my choice for happiness. If something happens, that's my choice, Sholmes. You're not the one who's hurting me. I know what I'm doing.
[He raises his hand to hold over the other's, as if to pull it away.]
...
I can't. Van Zieks is here, but besides him, I... [His face becomes sullen.] I can't throw away over fifteen years I've had with my dearest friend in the world for...for this.
Of something. Of anything. Not to run away and avoid me because of your fear.
[ He's trying to remain calm, but he feels a bit flustered, too. ]
I'm aware of the short time we've known each other, but you've literally held my soul and I've done the same to yours. You've gotten to see parts of me that no one has seen that I've known for years.
I don't care about the time. I'm listening to what I want.
[It was a spell. It wasn't real. None of it was real, wasn't it?]
I know what happened. And you, too, saw parts of me I would have rather kept locked away. But the fact stands. Whatever this is now, it was built on a farce done to...I don't know. Make us into entertainment, perhaps.
no subject
You can rely on me for that, too. Don't just burden yourself alone.
[ Then, a bit quieter. ]
Or anything else. I'm going to make it a point to check on you.
[ A thorn in the side, if you will. ]
no subject
[And a look back at him.]
Take care of yourself, no matter what. For my sake, at least.
[...He turns away.]
Come along, Irene. The game's afoot, yes?
no subject
Both his hands grab onto Sholmes' arms, holding him there from behind. ]
You minute you're telling me to jump off a cliff for all you care. Now you're telling me to do it for your sake.
[ His head drops against the back of Sholme's neck, giving a small laugh. ]
Maybe I'm just not getting it, but something in my gut is telling me not to let you leave just yet.
no subject
...Let me go.
[He says, quietly.]
I simply want you to be happy.
[Just obviously not with him. There's no happiness there.]
no subject
No. I can't.
[ His head raises just enough to place a small kiss at the base of his neck. It's selfish. He said he wouldn't demand anything of Sholmes, that he wasn't expecting anything.
But he can't just let him run away. It feels like something... would break. ]
You keep trying to make my choice for happiness. If something happens, that's my choice, Sholmes. You're not the one who's hurting me. I know what I'm doing.
no subject
..."You're not the one who's hurting me", and yet I'm the center of this particular equation. Funny how that works.
[You can't say that this is his choice when he's the center of that very choice! Dummy. Idiot. Fool.]
Don't I have a say in this, hm?
no subject
From where I'm standing, your choice just seems to be running away.
[ He lets out a low sigh. ]
You keep going on about worrying about hurting me, but isn't it the other way around?
no subject
[His tone of voice is getting harder, colder.]
And whatever do you mean about that?
no subject
[ His fingers ease up a little. ]
Don't just run away and I'll tell you.
no subject
[A sigh.]
[And he turns around to face him, without a word.]
no subject
[ His words are firm, but don't have any sharpness to them. Like he's trying to still hold some tenderness to them. ]
It feels like you're using the possibility of me getting hurt to make me back off, but I'm not really sure that's fully the case.
no subject
[He frowns.]
Then what is the case, then?
no subject
[ There's a bit of a shrug at that. ]
You're afraid something'll happen. I can pick up that much.
no subject
[He just doesn't say anything, for a moment.]
Why did you think I said "take care of yourself for my sake"?
no subject
[ He slowly picks up his hand to reach out toward Sholmes, to try to touch his cheek. ]
And why I couldn't just let you leave.
no subject
My feelings will stay the same whether you make me stay or let me leave, you know.
no subject
Why won't you just take the chance?
no subject
...
I can't. Van Zieks is here, but besides him, I... [His face becomes sullen.] I can't throw away over fifteen years I've had with my dearest friend in the world for...for this.
no subject
[ His brow furrows a little. He doesn't want to dismiss the dearest friend, but nods softly. ]
I'm not asking you to throw anyone away. I also don't want you to deny yourself because of excuses and fear.
no subject
[He actually bristles at that, slightly, but that next part makes his head hang low.]
You say it like I can have my cake and eat it too. It doesn't work like that.
no subject
[ It just came off worse than he meant. No surprise. And then he's going to shake his head. ]
I don't see why not. I'm still here trying to convince you, despite knowing this.
no subject
[There's a level of frustration in his tone.]
I've only known you for several days, Kotetsu. You're a good man, but...I can't.
no subject
[ He's trying to remain calm, but he feels a bit flustered, too. ]
I'm aware of the short time we've known each other, but you've literally held my soul and I've done the same to yours. You've gotten to see parts of me that no one has seen that I've known for years.
I don't care about the time. I'm listening to what I want.
no subject
[It was a spell. It wasn't real. None of it was real, wasn't it?]
I know what happened. And you, too, saw parts of me I would have rather kept locked away. But the fact stands. Whatever this is now, it was built on a farce done to...I don't know. Make us into entertainment, perhaps.
no subject
[ He's trying to keep calm and not let his emotions get the best of him because he doesn't want to end this on a poor note.
Finley is leaving Kotetsu's side to approach Irene, testing her waters with the hare. ]
I've had people mock me plenty for different things. Some probably think I'm just some joke. So it doesn't really bother me if that's what started it.
What I care about is what's there now. Can you honestly say you feel absolutely nothing here?
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)